Where’s The Fun in That?

Golden key and puzzle

You’re crouched behind a low wall, your heart is beating fast, you’re anxious, you’re scared you have a rifle in your hands, the gun is sighted, you pull the trigger. Bang! He’s dead. So where’s the fun in that?

The plan is laid, the bomb is strapped around your torso. Now walking, as calmly as you possibly can, headed to the crowded market. You pick your moment, you’re sweating profusely, yet you know this is the only way. Bang! You’re dead.  So where’s the fun in that?

You’ve had a drink too many, you’re feeling happy, he’s asked you back to his room. You’re having sex it’s exciting, you’re drunk, and now his friend is at it too. Bang! You’re mind is dead. So where’s the fun in that?

“Whether it be shooting at your enemies, choosing martyrdom, from the self-detonated bomb, or having exciting sex taken much too far, we’re all able to find a way to make a complete mess of our own little world, aren’t we?”

You might wonder what it is that compels us humans to be so damned self-destructive. It’s not as if we plan it this way is it? The plan is usually survival of one form or another. A belief in the afterlife, one much better than this, is obviously very appealing when you live in abject misery. Especially when the corrupted teachers of hate and fear get hold of your mind when young. What underdeveloped countries lack is all too obvious: good leadership.

And what about the night out turned sour? Or playing war games with real guns and bombs, ships and tanks? We didn’t plan on getting raped. We didn’t plan on getting shot or being the shooter, destroying our lives with the guilt and shame of taking life.

Looked at from afar, we can see the games we play as simply that: games that have gone too far. Games where the rules of proper sportsmanship have become confused and overly complicated. Games of fear that we play out in reality making our lives, and that of others, a hellish misery.

When young, if we’re lucky, we’re asked to ‘play nicely.’ To play our games in a way that is controlled and based on simple rules. We’re asked by our parents: “if you hit Johnny like that, how do you imagine he feels?” We’re asked to be gentle and loving, we’re shown how to play nicely. We’re taught empathy. It’s as if we’re lacking these lessons in though. It’s as if we’re missing the lessons of how to love and build compassion for our fellow man.

How do the people left behind feel when you blow yourself up? How do the loved ones, of the man you’ve just shot, feel, when picking up the pieces of your violent act? If you take this woman when she’s drunk – with little control over her mind – how will she feel in the morning? Will you feel like a man or a coward? Would you feel ashamed? A real, courageous, strong man, doesn’t overpower a woman, to get what he needs, he respects her needs first. Where have all these men gone? Where are all the gentle-men?

“Truly courageous men and women don’t take up the gun or the bomb in the belief it will get the job done. True courage is displayed by those who seek, the more challenging and difficult job, of finding peaceful solutions. Where have all the peace-keepers gone?”

We can carry on failing and flailing, in an unthinking way, or we can plan to succeed. We succeed, not through destruction, but by the construction of loving bonds and lasting resolutions to the lazy solution of fuelling violence, anger and hatred. It starts with understanding how we fail. We fail through failing to plan with empathy and love for each other in our hearts. We fail by failing to plan.


When it comes to planning, and specifically how we plan on finding the correct people to lead us, it’s seems we’ve still to learn from our mistakes. We humans, don’t necessarily always learn from our mistakes, only sometimes.

So what about leadership? Those who are drawn to politics are not necessarily the correct calibre of people to lead us. We need a rethink. At the end of the day, it’s us that’re electing people who border on – or are completely full blown – psychopaths. Loving, powerful leaders with the skill of empathy, are rare, how do we find them? We find them in their childhood.

We must teach our children empathy and how to be effective leaders in their childhood. Only then will we have a pool of potentials, who, as adults, can lead us all on to greatness. Sound crazy? Think about it. We really do need a rethink, or perhaps just a reminder, of how and why certain leaders, from our distant past, became so great.