Understanding Love

Additional tools to help navigate our way through life, love and relationships

“When we truly understand love – following its simple rules – we will live life well”

It’s interesting because we immediately think, following the rules of love, throughout our lives, is likely to be the easiest path. It is, however, there is one important proviso: We must all have a clean and clear understanding of what it is.

We watch the news and it becomes very easy for us to jump on the same bandwagon, as journalist, and start aggressively pointing the finger of blame. In the past I’ve done this myself. I’ve ranted and become angry and frustrated. It doesn’t change things when we react in this way though, in fact, it just makes matters worse. Far better to understand why – the things that are wrong in our societies are prevalent – and then educate people into understanding the dangers and repercussions of failing to love and protect our children.

“For better to educate people into understanding the hows and whys of their behaviour and then teaching them how things could be better thought out; thinking skills are needed”

Now, we could say this is a loving response to neglect and abuse, for example. Abuse happens, keeps happening, and this will remain the case, as long as people are ignorant to the truth of how and why. Raising awareness is the name of the game here. Doing this in a gentle and effective manner is where love comes into play. Never be mistaken, this doesn’t mean that love is the gentle sentimentality it’s often mistaken for, no, when we properly love, we empower. This has nothing to do with sentimentality.

We might think there’s no changing the unsavoury aspects to humanity. We might think this because the people within – these darker aspects – aren’t interested. We might be right. It may well be that some people are lost to us; that some minds are just too broken and the repression of ignorance too great. If this is the case, then we must focus on the young. It’s this next generation, through being enlightened to the mistakes of their parents (us), that will change the world for the better. We never enlighten when we blame. All we do is create resistance from the stubborn ego.


“When we realise and accept the full repercussions of physical and emotional abuse we change”

When we see that much of this abuse is due to ignorance we change. Some parents may be surprised to learn, their responsibility to our children is far greater, than they first realised. Yes society as a whole has a responsibility to our children, yet when there exists such divide, in terms of parental awareness of this, we have a problem. Society must be there to support parents but not take on too many of their responsibilities.

Children need to experience clean and clear love from those they’ve bonded to. Due to our current belief in family, children bond to specific people, and not society as a whole until later. Children obviously need society but their need for parental love is greater. Governments must come to understand this if they’re to improve mental health and the issues of physical and emotional abuse. Whether parents like it or not, we must find a way to lift them, from ignorance.

Something clearly stated is: We love our children when we empower them. For example, even though we may fear the dentist, we love our children by taking them to see the health professionals government has provided. Government provides the service, we love and care for our children, when we educate ourselves about their importance. If we want our children to live better lives than ourselves, we must educate ourselves into what it is, that’s held us back in the past.

“It can never be the job of governments to love our children”

There are parents, who don’t actually care what quality of life our children are likely to have, once grown. There are those parents who have no care for understanding cause and effect. Some of these children are the ones who go on to propagate the darker aspects of society. They will always exist. If it should happen, that individuals are woken by some random event or understanding, it will have been love that did this.

The benefits to loving our children are often missed. Parents that don’t care sufficiently have yet to see the benefit to fully understanding love. We can know, those who’ve not been shown empowering love in their own childhood, will find it challenging to show this to their offspring. It’s a cycle that can only be broken through increased awareness. We must be aware: when we empower others we empower ourselves.

Only last night, I found myself pondering, once again, on how it is so many shy away from understanding themselves better. In some respects, this must come down to what kind of things are instilled into our minds, as interests, when young. Is inquisitiveness not something we’re all born with? Perhaps this is yet to be sufficiently encouraged and nurtured? Is it not natural for the human mind to be inquisitive? How is it we’re not encouraging an inquisitiveness into the workings of our own minds?

As example, many people simply jump into their cars, not giving a hoot about how it actually works. How does the car do what it does? On a personal level I find it bewildering that so many are simply not interested in this. In the same light, I find it bewildering that so many of us simply don’t care, about how our minds work. Is it this, or have we been scared off, by the intellectuals?

“Psychology has been labelled a science, as such, its been over-complicated by those who have something to prove”

Too many people seeking new and better understandings of a subject that’s already awash with theories. Here guys, I’ll tell you why there’s so much mental illness in the world: TOO MUCH FEAR AND IGNORANCE – NOT ENOUGH LOVE. When we confuse and over-complicate things, we’re only adding to the problem. It’s not helping. How would it be if you had nothing to prove? How would it be if you stopped needing to prove your intelligence by owning a subject that belongs to all? There need be no qualification in understanding the mind. It ought to be something all children have.

And so, love, is empowerment. We empower our children when we care enough to want them to have better lives than ourselves. We do this when we understand maturity and what it is to be grown. A mature love is when we take full responsibility for ourselves and our children. We may think, for example, that keeping a child quiet with a sugar-dummy is effective, however, the mature empowerment of love states: a child is kept happy and contented, not with sugar, but with our loving attention. If we can’t give this attention we must learn how. Simple. If this sounds like I’m pointing the finger of blame, you may want to read more. All the best, with love.